It all started when I planned to go and spend the afternoon in the park, donning shorts and a summer goddess look, off I went with my picnic blanket, book, sunglasses, sun cream and bottle off water and found a nice shady spot out of the sun and settle down to read my book…….
Two hours later I awoke to find the pages of said book stuck to the side of my face with now dry drool….After a quick look round to check no one had seen my Waynette Slob impression, it occurred to me that my legs were a bit red and I had forgotten to put on sun cream. So I thought it was better to get out the sun altogether. When I got home I located a bottle of “Tan prolonging after sun” and happily slapped it all over the back of my legs and thought nothing of it. Off I went into public places with various friends for the rest of the afternoon..….giggling about how bad my legs looked and admiring how they were turning brown already (obviously due to my great skin.)
When I got home, having noticed my legs now looked half tangoed, I had a second look at the bottle……..In the smallest ever letters under the “Tan prolonging after sun” it said “contains self tan”.....
I have attempted to make my legs look the same colour all over by putting the “after sun/tanning lotion” all over my legs but now I look like a tangoed mess……..I hate fake tan for a reason......Now where are my trousers???
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