Saturday, 23 October 2010

Just because no one knows.....

"I sing because I'm happy. I sing because I'm free. His eye is on the sparrow and I know he watches me."

Ever since I can remember I have loved to sing. I still know all the words to The Little Mermaid.
When I was little I used to think that one day I would meet "My Eric" and we would live happily ever after. Now I'm older I know that is not going to happen.

I can remember being told to "shut up" by my Dad when I sang. I can remember him recruiting my older sister to belittle me as they would wait outside my bedroom for me to start singing. Then brust in the door so they could laugh in my face and tell me how terrible I was. Now I only sing to myself when know one is around.

A few years ago two of my friends clubbed together and got the best present I ever received. Singing lessons. That is how I met Rachel she has gone from singing teacher to one of my closest friends in the world. I introduce her as "My Opera Singing Friend" because I am so proud of what she does. She is a bucket of positive energy to my half empty attitude. She exactly what I need and she is the only person who has ever heard me sing properly and not laughed.

I have a love affair with Musicals and I cry when I watch them. Probably because I wish it was me. I can remember when my love affair started, it was when I watched "The Phantom of the Opera" when I was 10 years old. My Mum and Nana had decided to take my older
sister and I as a treat. I remember being to small to see the stage and sitting on a booster seat. As the lights went down and the music boomed around the theatre, I was mesmerised and hooked for life!

Then came the final scene. I tried so hard not to cry, I felt the burn as
the lump in my throat tried to fight its way out. Then suddenly I wailed like the child I was....

The whole theatre seemed to turn to stare at me. I was so embarrassed
and hid my red face on my Mum's lap, but the women just smiled at me with understanding, I was allowed to cry, I was a child, they were not. From that day on a became a "Musical Junkie"

So here you are. You are now one of only a few people who knows my secret.

My hidden passion.

1 comment:

  1. Honestly, what is it with parents that feel they must stifle our growth and make us want to hide within ourselves? They can be so toxic sometimes.

    I'm glad you found your song, I hope you'll let no one steal it from you. xx


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